Those who have challenges with immune balance realize that part of the healing process comes from within.  Our love for ourselves and others has a major impact on our healing and well-being. The work we do in this area may be more powerful than any medicine or supplement we can take to balance our biochemistry. Let’s talk about love. My views about love and the nature of being human have been influenced by years of spiritual study, my life experience and my intuition and instinct.

Have you ever had someone say that you can’t love others if you don’t love yourself?  I believe that the saying is a bit too simplistic.  Most of us don’t love ourselves unconditionally, even though we may be striving for this. We may have received negative messages about ourselves that prevented us from seeing our true nature as it is.  We have many other aspects of our humanness, and yet love is at our core.  This enables us to love others even if we don’t fully love ourselves.

I’ve had to learn much about love over the years. The turning point in my life came when I felt deeply disappointed by the actions of my family with regard to one of my children.  I took their actions personally, felt hurt about my child, and very unsupported as a mother. At that time, I based my self-love and self-worth on the opinions and actions of others.  I reasoned that because I had tried to be a kind and compassionate family member, that my family would respond to my needs in the same way. I feared confronting my family because I thought they wouldn’t understand the issues. I was afraid that speaking up would damage my relationship with them.  Instead of voicing my hurt, I brushed the issue aside, and four months later, bam!, I had a full-blown episode of depression.  I reached out and got help to climb out of that pit, and it was a positive turning point in my life. I started down a healing path that included nourishing and caring for my body and spirit in a way that I had never done before.

Taking care ourselves well via food, activities, pampering and expression is a nice way to start the healing process.  This is how we nurture an infant. Why not do it for ourselves? Over the years my self-care has evolved into getting into a deeper relationship with my true nature. I am recognizing this nature as love. I’m not unique – we are all the same on the deepest level. The love is sometimes hidden by the ordinary challenges of being human, but it’s there. This is why we don’t really need others to approve of us or fuel our self worth. We already have everything we need!

How did I get to this place of self-acceptance, of knowingness about my inner love? I found spiritual teachers, read books, took courses, and most of all, I kept working on loving others, creating safe space for them, and accepting them unconditionally.  I take a brief time out several times per day, to connect with my inner being.  Have I perfected this? Of course not, it’s ongoing work. And that work is part of what has kept me healthy and in love with life.

What is your own relationship with your lovingness? Can you feel it when you become still? What does it tell you?  How might you connect with that love within yourself to enhance your own healing path?

More than a pill and a pat on the back!

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